There are such things in every person’s mind that his life partner should be like this, it should be like that, etc. But this does not actually happen, why? Because whenever two people come in contact with each other, there is friendship in the beginning, then when there is equality in mutual thinking, they start to grow closer and gradually love begins. Then the love begins to grow and eventually get married. After a couple of years of marriage, those romantic pass very well, their mutual love and happiness reach their peak, but gradually everything starts decreasing. You start arguing so much that you don’t care if any outsider is present and start fighting Infront of everyone. But have you thought why this happens? There are two types of conceptions in the society. 1 / Love Marriage 2 / arrange Marriage
Ø Kind of marriage doesn’t make any difference: –
western countries have love marriages, yet in 1 year or so, why do things start coming up to divorce. It means that it doesn’t matter weather is it a love marriage or arranged.
Ø In beginnings everything seems so good: – Even after four or five years of love, even close partners do not understand their partner’s lace. When love is new, there is a lot of love and fun on Whats-app.
Living together can brings differences come forth:– Until “love” Or “marriage” is new, then everything seems very beautiful, and that time the whole world looks like heaven. On the matter, mutual love, respect and dedication is seen, when a lot of love, respect and care starts from the lover or girlfriend, then the person becomes so crazy with happiness that everyone except his/her lover; seems to be enemy or alien. The person becomes blind and indiscriminate in the love of the person in front, even going against the whole world and makes love marriage. But as the shortcomings and evils of each other begin to appear, the distances start increasing. Experienced people say that marriage should be done very thoughtfully, but how? Will you know about someone who is a psychic or a God? After remembering that after 7 or 8 years of Love Affair, the marriage broke down in 6 months. It is a bitter truth that one birth is too short to know someone. In this context, Western countries have given birth to a new tradition of living relationships. Even after 10 years of living relationship, even 10 percent of the marriage is not guaranteed. There are many people in our society whose 30–35 years of marriage have passed, yet they have not been able to understand each other till yet. It is not so easy to understand the nature of any person, to ask the truth, one life is too short to understand someone.
Ø Master Pre planning doesn’t work here: – Love and marriage is not a business, which can be done very carefully. This is destiny, that is, the hands of God, not the hands of any man or woman.
Then what is the need to worry whoever will come into your life when every event is predetermined. Whatever the marriage is, it should be your aim to make it successful and no matter how successful you are. You should not boast of yourself at all. It is from here that I (ego) is born that starts appearing spontaneously in your behavior. This pride only keeps you away from yourself. Nobody even likes you. Gradually you become almost alone. In such a situation, who will make you a partner and yet if you are successful too, very soon your marital life will be destroyed due to your nature of arrogance and impracticality.
Ø Ego is one of the main reason of break up: – Ego is the biggest obstacle in the link of living a happy life with a life partner, so first ‘I’ (ego) will have to abandon and become a nun.
Ø Both come from a different culture and family atmosphere (brought up differences) : –whenever a marriage takes place, both the spouses who are born in two different families. The thinking and values of their parents and parents will be completely different. When both partners grew up in two different families, it is natural that their thinking will also be completely different. Therefore, thinking and attitude towards life will also be different. This is to say that sibling despite of being children of same parents’ parent, and raised in the same environment and values, often fight like cats and dogs, and this is where large, different families grew up in two completely different environments. Here we are talking about two people coming from successfully living together. .
Ø You have had hold on, only 50% of your life: – In this case, differences in thoughts and thinking are relevant. Fifty percent of life partner depends on “luck” But fifty percent is in “your hands”. So, when choosing your spouse under fifty percent, first of all do your own analysis and take full honesty towards yourself and note all your shortcomings, and think with fairness about who can accept you with these shortcomings. There are several flaws in every human being, and this is a very well-known fact also. So, your partner will also have many shortcomings. The ability to ignore mutual differences not only has to be created, but both of them will also have to implement it. All these things will prove to be as accurate for love life as for married life. You will have to find the following things in your life partner: –
a) Respect: – Apart from loving your spouse, you also have to give full respect, and this honor should be clearly visible at all times by the conduct of both.
b) Trustworthy: -You should become a trustworthy life partner. Conquer him so much that he/she shares every little thing in his life, every good and bad thing, all the right and inappropriate things with you in a straightforward manner and you always maintain the secrecy of everything they share.
c) Keeping secrecy: they should never use, their secretes (which may have been done by you in extreme emotions at some point) as a weapon, even in a mutual fight. Because if it did, it would be the biggest betrayal for his/her.
d) Strong support in every field: – Always support each other during grief and heartbreak. Always stand, like a rock in front of each and every obstacle in life. When he/she sleeps at night while holding each other’s hand or by putting their head on each other’s chest, make sure that they feel “complete security” and make them feel, that they are the safest person in the world. Give your partner as much security that the partner sleeps like a carefree innocent child.
e) Fully Open yourself, Infront of her/him: – You should yourself, should also share every little thing in your life, with each other. Share so much and with such confidence they proudly say “I know my spouse better than himself.” And if they give any opinion to each other, with full respect they should take it seriously then do a deep thought.
f) You should exist her/his life’s every moment: –
Never let him/her feel lonely. He/she should be aware of your presence at all times.
Nowadays, most of the people live on mobile and socials media and internet for twenty-four hours, it should not happen at all, whether it is a woman or a male,
you have to get out of this fantasy world. For a mobile world, both have to make a definite time line, and there should never be any fear, hesitation or fear while sharing the mobile. Your mobile life should also be as clear as glass
g) Always overlook the minor faults or mistakes: -If we talk about flaws, everyone has have it, no one born perfect, if you have flaws so does your partner, but would ignore them and try to focus on finding each other’s only good things.
h) Prima facie should be Remember nice things and incidences only: -Always keep each other’s good things in mind, with each other in grief and let us remain fully devoted to each other. Do not be suspicious of your partner under the influence of any third person or other, do not start fussing over such things without thinking or confronting about it. There should be so much truth and transparency in each other that tries a millions that they can never split you both. If you follow fifty percent of the above things, then your love life or married life will never be spoiled.
i) Both are equally responsible for their “bad” as well as “good” circumstances: – And finally, in the context of successful love life or successful married life, all the things I have said or shared with you, it is not only for male or female, but for both, to adopt equally. Adopt the above-mentioned things first before your partner. As soon as you start behaving like this vice versa you will also get to see the same behavior in response in the manner you conduct it.” It might take some time but it will surely come as a result, you will definitely get a nice happy long love life. And if in life, if you find a good life partner and your mutual relations and behavior are also as mentioned above, then surely you will be the luckiest woman or man in this world and then although you have had many difficulties in your life, nevertheless still you Will be counted among the successful people of the whole world.
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Article by
Aakesh Aainan
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